Eddie Murphy to Play
Artist Jean Michel Basquiat in "Under Covers"
(Photo by I. Stoalit)
Painstaking in attention to detail, Hollywood
superstar and black cultural icon Eddie Murphy was chosen to play the lead role in a movie
about the New York artist who died from a Warhol (Steve Martin) overdose years ago.
"To get ready for this role,
I had all my teeth knocked out of my head, one by one," admitted Murphy, whose skull
resembled that of the addict cum artiste. "And then I had my skin pulled away
from the frame of my body and muscular structures were added to my bones. A Jamaican
bobsledder was kind enough to organ donate his scalp to me, and here," Murphy
fingered a massive dreadlock trailing to his shoulder. "Here is the prize. I
can make love with myself."
Three days ago Murphy showed up
on the set, mumbling and incoherent, clutching a bargain-size bottle of Oxycontin.
The guards who beat him were eventually suspended without pay, but the actor did not seem
to mind. Close friends are concerned that the acute businessman may have changed,
though few are reluctant to come forward and make assertions. Murphy's mother was
upbeat, even at news that her son had gone so far as to have breasts implants.
"Eddie is fooling," his
mother was quoted as saying after a long Sunday morning Baptist church service.
"Washing his ass and taking the fool like his daddy always did. Sometimes Eddie
eats too much Taco Bell and just up and loses his mind."
Basquiat's fondness for primary
colors is reflected in tattoos Murphy sported on his face: an orange dolphin, a ruby Exit
sign, and a stark white tricorn. Upon inquiry, Murphy demonstrated how he had done
his own inking. The star seized Connie Chung by the throat during a live interview
and inked on her chin a small map of mainland China.
"The story won't surprise
you," Murphy later answered his critics cryptically. "If you are shaky in
the least in your converse with the beast, let the halo of the day pass you by." ----- [ BACK ]